Product of the Week!

This week's product is a book. A book I can safely say kept us sane in the last few weeks. I don't normally do this type of thing either. I don't like reading childcare books. I find that I'm usually already doing what they say and I have a few "Duh!" moments and throw the book to the wayside or I just don't agree with their methods. The book, 'Good Night, Sleep Tight: The Sleep Lady's Guide to Helping Your Child Go to Sleep, Stay Asleep and Wake Up Happy' (Sheesh!) actually did do all those things. I bought the book out of desperation and had a friend suggested it. Her child wasn't sleeping through the night. She read the book. The kid sleeps like magic. We were on month three of that after an almost entirely blissful year of angel baby sleep through the night nights. We removed … [Read more...]

Anyone Got a Light?

Morning. I need a cigarette or four and a bourbon. I don't even drink bourbon, but it sounds like the breakfast of champions right about now. It's definetly the day after a vacation where it's all craziness and mayhem after you come home. Needy child after being at grandma's, laundry, errands, and well, back to work. Yippie Skippie!The trip home was essentially uneventful unless you count the woman giving birth, or at least that is what is sounded like, in the Maryland rest stop bathroom. Wow. The screams. The wails and cries for "Dear God help me! Someone help me with the Pains! It was like Melanie was giving birth all over again during the siege of Atlanta in there. We found high chairs at lunch time and we got home before we both totally went over the edge of sanity after being … [Read more...]

Over the river and through the woods…

We have internet! It's really true! My fingers have been positively itching the last few days and now it's here! My parents, having just moved into a new place had to wait until their provider got their little booties together and extended the internet privledge to them. At last.The trip up North did not start off as planned. When does it when a toddler is involved? H, feeling sentimental, had the brilliant idea to wake T.D. up early the morning of departure. I cringed and declared I did not like this plan. I could see chaos written all over it. However, I let him do it much to my chagrin. Chaos did indeed reign that morning after H left for work. Instead of getting myself ready and loading the care while she slept I did it while Lex, the dog escaped out the front door and a … [Read more...]

Road Trip!

My mother called last night. She felt I needed directions of the utmost detail for their new house. T.D. and I are heading out for a few days into a land without internet. I'm scared. I will feel so alone. I will miss you internets. The conversation with my mother went something like this-Mom: Ok, when you get to this route you will pass the casino. Really pass it. The whole thing. Don't be fooled by the other roads that seem like our roads. They are marked like that. So go pass the casino employee parking until employee lot 10. Lot 10. Employee Lot 10. Ok? Me: Desperately trying to listen and not laugh as she confuses me with more and more details in what I know is really quite simple. Mom: The road to our house is really narrow, winding and hilly. So hilly and narrow and … [Read more...]

Her Majesty Isn’t Pleased

To her credit T.D. doesn't waver. She has a strong personality I know this. It shines through whether it's 2 a.m. or 2 p.m. Yesterday I got a good dose of how strong that little dictator's will really is. The temper tantrums have begun. I am in disbelief. Ok, I was in disbelief. My eyelids have peeled away from my eyes in the way that only intense screaming can induce. On Saturday night when she screamed bloody hell like Norma Rae in an On the Border restaurant, throwing spoons, food, and cups around like confetti, H and I were shocked. I was also horrifically embarrassed. MY CHILD doesn't do this. I knew it was bound to happen sometimes but, really this was new territory. Naptimes have always produced tears and screeches, restaurants do not. Yesterday, I simply wanted to take … [Read more...]

Scrub Tina! Scrub!

So it's going to be one of those days...I'm feeling a little Joan Crawford like. Scary, I know, but Mommie Dearest traits probably reside in all of us at some point right? Please someone tell me I'm right! They are either deep below the surface or sometimes fearfully bubbling up a little too close on some days I think. Now before someone sends me a nastygram about child abuse that is not what I'm talking about here. It's just one of those days where it's not even 9 a.m. and I already feel close to losing it. I think I just need some alone time. Me time. Time without someone at my feet, grabbing at me, or tripping me up as I wade through the sea of alphabet blocks and cracker crumbs. The dog is not an innocent bystander either. She's quite possibly the most evil little instigator out there … [Read more...]

Die! Sissy Ants Die!

First I would like to say a big THANK YOU to all of you who sent me your ant killing advice. From you I learned that cayenne pepper kills ants in sunny California while 409 Antibacterial spray works best in Hawaii. Did you know that alcohol and water will kill evil little ants residing in Massachusetts? I do now. I tried all of these techniques over the last few days. I have to say that they are working. Even the pepper. No ant is crossing my threshold now.Oh and the ant traps and Raid help too. The search for that stuff was for some reason far more complex than it ever needed to be. I looked at three stores and thought I was going to lose it as I wandered around Target today looking like a complete loon. I was shuffling the aisles with varying speeds, T.D.'s hair flying backwards … [Read more...]

If I had nuts

I've been a bit frazzled this morning. Hm.. more than a bit. We are having a grand old time in our house now that we are having full nights of sleep once again. Whoo hoo! I know we party so hard in our house. She's doing some bizarre tribal screaming thing in the early morning hours though. It's a test. Or perhaps a transition. Dictators are commanding and bark orders gruffly. This scream is more like that of a spoiled heir. We're playing a game of who breaks first at this point.I don't know why I feel so frazzled either. I'm made my deadline and what I'm working on now isn't too time sensitive. I baked my ass off yesterday, making dozens of cookies and brownies for a bake sale at H's work. It's all for the cause. The Avon Walk for Breast Cancer cause. I was thwarted in my … [Read more...]

My Little Frankenstein

This morning started off with a gag. A whine and a gag. The dog started whimpering around 4:45 a.m. Then T.D. woke up demanding sustenance. As soon as that was taken care of, the second floor toilet began to gurgle and hum in ratjher menacing way and began to run continuously. H got up to fix it. As he walked back into the room the unmistakable sound of puking ensued. Lex, the dog, was throwing up. The toilet began it's run again. It's morning in our household and a Monday to be sure.I didn't want to get up. Seeing as I have a deadline looming though I knew I had to squeeze in a few hours of work before T.D. awoke again for good. As I lay in bed I recalled the weekend which was a blur. Aren't they always? Errands, work, figuring out our budget, and some fun thrown in I couldn't … [Read more...]

Fun! A present!

I have not been having the easiest time in certain areas of my life. Remarkably the cold turky pacifier event has resulted in only one 5 minute 2 a.m. wake up. T.D. is now back to sleeping through the night. She only seems to miss it a bit at nap time. Now she just sniffs her pink blanket a tad bit more. She's getting weird about that blanket, weird like, Producers/Matthew Broderick weird. I think the adjustment to being at home has even gone well. It's the grousing of my daily frustrations I miss. Commiserating. I can't seem to find a way to do that. It's not like the other Mom's on my block are writers and know what that is like. Some days the only person I talk to beyond the age of one is H. It's getting to him. It's getting to us. We were heading down a slippery slope. … [Read more...]