The morning started off well enough. I got TD off to Bubble Camp (best idea ever!) and took myself and The Comedian to the gym. I got in a nice run and worked up quite a sweat and was sufficiently pleased with myself. I walked into that bizarre TV/ironing room in the women's locker room and things went down hill from there.-As I went into Warrior pose I somehow lost my balance and fell over face first. I iz wicked graceful. My face? It hit the arm rest on a chair placed in that room for optimal TV viewing. -Next, I opened my gym bag to hit the shower and realized that I forgot my shower shoes. My feet itch just thinking about it. The entire time I was standing in the shower I could think of only two things. One, Madonna telling Letterman that she pees in the shower to kill Athletes … [Read more...]
Biting the Big One
I'm not quite sure where to begin. It's not like when I was younger and I could just go off for a few days, write some deeply unprofound thoughts in my journal, break a few things and take a series of long drives. I barely have time to remember to turn off the burners on the stove these days much less time to figure out what is normal.That's the thing- I don't know what is normal anymore.I don't think it is normal to keep thinking such incredibly sad, circular thoughts. Thoughts that don't even make sense. Like sitting down feeding Dash Two and remembering the death of my 6th grade friend's mother. The crack in her twelve year old voice as she called from the hospital to let me know that it had finally happened. Suddenly, that memory is playing over and over again in my mind and I feel the … [Read more...]
Light It Up!
Now with an Alternate Title: "Vicky's Terrible, Horrible, No Good, Very Bad Day"Uh... yeah. So if I could have lit a day on fire and just set it ablaze, yesterday would have been that day. I would have just torched that sucker after dousing it in lighter fluid or about 18 gallons of gasoline and let it burn, baby, burn.We woke up late and as I hurried us off to school- can't miss school picture day after all- I was a bit stressed but coming out of it. Nothing a good dose of "kid at school" quiet time won't fix. I ran some quick errands, did a bit of work, showered and was good to go. Relaxed and everything. Pick up from school was a whiny trek home but it was to be expected. She gets worn the hell out. What I didn't anticipate was the following:-Whining in the car.-Whining on the sidewalk … [Read more...]
Candy Corn = Massive Meltdown
I know what you are thinking. TD wanted candy corn. TD did not get candy corn. TD has massive meltdown. End of story.Nope. The meltdown was all mine and it happened happily in my home and not out in public. That would have been really embarrassing for H.Call it hormones, a house over run with home projects, baby stuff and just our own stuff and I lost it. There I was trying to write, supposed to be writing/working and I just couldn't. The infant car seat was apart on the floor in front of me with the Jolly Jump-Up, excersaucer and taken apart baby swing. If I looked to my left power tools and paint covered almost every surface. Toddler toys crawled out from every corner of my home and laundry snarled and snapped at my feet. The stairs to my house were a landmine of items to be put … [Read more...]
Scary Even to Me
Sometimes life just gets to be too much. No amount of wine or cigarettes (I wish!) will do. A nap, a good book, or a time out just isn't sufficient. Pedicure? Yeah right.What you need is a good crying jag. Or a meltdown of such epic proportions that has built up for so long that you scare even yourself back into normalcy. Your kid? Well, I feel I have scarred mine for life now and spent a good half hour apologizing to a child who just looked up at me with huge eyes. How did this happen?1. Lack of sleep. Sleep has been positively elusive to me the last few days and now weeks. Each day it gets worse. (Do NOT suggest Tylenol PM or some natural remedy for sleep the do NOT work on this woman) That does not make for a totally sane Mommy. 2. Ongoing and unfinished house projects. Debris in … [Read more...]