Cross-posted and archived from DC Metro Moms. Original post date March 18, 2008.Last year when I was new to the whole work at home Mom thing I wrote a post about the guilt I feel and lay on myself. It wasn't so much that I had guilt over not enough time with my child or family it was the day in and day out beating I gave to just me over staying home and continuing to work. I couldn't find the balance. I wrote-What it all really boils down to is that inherently in me I've always had issues with being at home. Now that I'm here in the daily mire of it and yes, the joys of it, I'm conflicted. I just can't seem to hand myself over to that domestic mommy. I can't and won't give up trying to write, no one wants me to, but I can't seem to find a balance that sits well with me. I can't seem … [Read more...]
The Wonders of Sleep
I'm nice right now. And um, still a teensy bit brain dead. I have good days and bad days and in the past two weeks more bad than good. When I realized this my little PPD nerve center went on alert and I found myself standing in the middle of a room wondering if this was the other shoe dropping. Was postpartum depression going to hit me again a third time? The very thought of it made me weepy. Then angry. Then yup, you guessed it. Weepy again. I wanted to crawl under the covers and hibernate. I felt twitchy and snappy evil. My eyes may or may not have glowed red once or twice. I wanted to talk to someone, anyone about this, but then no one at all. Call it a case of being sick of dealing with this type of shit. The third time would not be the charm. Then an interesting thing … [Read more...]
Tell Me We Are Smarter Than This
Cross-posted and archived from DC Metro Moms. Original post from October 31, 2007. Article referenced no longer available. It was regarding parents who let their children eat all their Hallloween loot in one sitting. I read articles like this one from Reuters and I think who is the audience for this type of piece? Morons? I mean really! Moderate sugar intake on Halloween? Wowie Kazowie I would have never thought o f that! Gee, thanks doctor of the moment! Thank you for that enlightening piece of information. Before your insightful words Mr. MD I was just going to give my two year old all the candy in one sitting. She could just plop herself down on the floor in front of whatever horror movie is playing, maybe I’ll let her watch Suspiria. That has ballet in it and it’s … [Read more...]
Tomorrow is a Good Day
It can only get better I keep thinking. Yet, as I drove out of the party store parking lot and it wasn't even 10 a.m. all I could think was, "Tomorrow is going to be a good day. Today is what makes tomorrow necessary." Tomorrow H gets the elective snip. His Facebook status is all about jockey's and frozen corn. All things needed for this much anticipated (at least on my part) surgery. High fives all around from my sistah's! Sorry, H. Today I got woken up at 5 a.m. by The Fifth Element. I did the Night of the Living Dead walk to her nursery and fed her. Half hour later, if that, she was up again. S'alright. H's alarm had already been going off for the last fifteen minutes. I was up. I fed her again in bed and … [Read more...]
Spit Up in the Grass
They say the grass is always greener on the other side. I say this because despite knowing all its thorns and prickles I envy the Mom's who drop off their kids at the bus stop each day only to pick them up eight hours later. What leisure and bliss! Errands without unlatching car seat straps! Time to work without interruption or blocks being lobbed at your head! Then again, I'm sure that to some it seems that I'm the greener grass. Someone must think that, right? Please tell me they do to save me my sanity. Heh. I'm here to dispel that fairy tale. Today, for example, is a prime candidate for destroying myths. Scene 1- The Halloween gel sticker decorations we placed on the window yesterday afternoon? The Comedian ate … [Read more...]
Where’s Mummy?
I'm no longer at Wendy's selecting from the 'You Pick 2' menu sadly (I so enjoyed my lunch out with other bloggy friends) but I am here and there. At MPR we're talking aboutBetter Oats OatmealKorres Liquid LipstickUmi's new shoes for fall.Hershey's Halloween CandyMy Name is Not IsabellaAll Nighter All Over Shimmer PowderI am looking for answers to the horrible affliction that is called Colic in 'Got Colic'. TheMotherhood and I will be hosting a discussion on this on November 2 so stay tuned. At Juno Baby it's 'Things I Should Have Learned By Now', and 'A Love Letter to My Middle Child'.I'm out before Panera kicks me out. Have a great weekend! Go dig through a pumpkin or something. … [Read more...]
So is that like, uh a real job?
It is always when I'm about to go to an event with a lot of our friends that I begin to feel the 'I' word. Insecure. I didn't always feel that way. Nope. It only started when I quit my 9-5 job and decided to make a go of this whole writing thing that I felt these pangs of insecurity. We go to an event and the topic of work comes up. No one asks me about my job anymore. I'm left out of the conversation unless I shoehorn my way in. When I would begin to talk about a particular project I could see the judgment. The "HA! Yeah right! You don't really work anymore, you just stay home." It has been said to me more than once. It has gotten to the point that now I don't even talk about work. Even if I'm really excited about something or something big is coming up I just find something else to … [Read more...]
Overheards- Clowns
Scene: TD and I are out for a walk, just the two of us. We pass by a house with the front door open so she can see inside their foyer. A two foot high clown dressed in a green and gold lame costume is standing like a sentry in the corner.TD: OOOhhh, look at that clown. I love that clown. I want that clown in our house.V: I don't know about that. I don't really like clowns. TD: You don't like clowns?! (This cannot be! How can someone not like clowns?)V: No, they creep me out. Clowns scare me.TD: They scare you? Why? V: I don't know. They just do. Some people just don't like clowns. (I shudder as I think of all the scary clowns from my life- the red, white and blue one that hung in my nursery as a child. I can … [Read more...]
Styrofoam
I don't think H's grandmother had any idea that a box packed full of styrofoam peanuts would have quite this effect on TD or our house. (Pardon the poor video quality, it was dark, it was my phone.)Later, she was absolutely convinced that there was one special styrofoam peanut that was her new best friend. Then, she lost him. Yes, it was a him. When I tried to humor her and look for "him" with her I began to wonder if she was messing with me. V: What does your best friend look like?TD: He's green and small.V: Right. Green and small. Anything else?TD: He can sit up.Impressive.I glanced at H across the room who was trying to stifle a laugh as he swept up the sea of peanuts laying waste to our floor. I mouthed, "I think she is fucking with me." Twenty minutes later she was still mourning the … [Read more...]
Beyond the Couch to 5k
So here I am beginning week four in my Couch to 5k training and it hit me as I was out running on Saturday. I'm impatient. OK, I already knew that. I can be like a cat on meth when it comes to having patience. I really don't want to go many more months of fitting into larger sizes or making due with the few bigger clothes that I have. I want to be in my old size NOW. Spare me the, "You just had a baby!" cries. It's de-motivating. Back in 2007, after I birthed the Tiny Dicatator, I went on a month long journey of working out. For 30 days/4 weeks I would work out every day. It seems insane and I actually made it five weeks and eliminated sugar and alcohol during that time, but it worked. I'm not that nutty this time around. At the … [Read more...]