The Stepford Twitch

I've talked about how I have a tendency to overextend myself over here before. It seems I just don't learn my lesson. I wanted to cut down on reviews but have I done that? Nope. I just promise away, book myself into a corner and then reap the benefits/scheduling conflicts. More and more I find myself wishing for a whole day where the phone never rings, I resist the urge to check my email and I just sit and watch so much bad television I forget I have legs and my butt loses all feeling. Come to my house that day around 9 p.m. and I would be in a wasteland of Halloween hangover inducing candy, nacho detritus and pizza crusts. My hopeful ideas of going for a run usurped by an all too compelling episode of Rob & Big or America's Next Top Model. Sounds like heaven right about now. Wait! Let … [Read more...]

He Works for the Government. He can’t be Fired.

A funny thing happened to me on the way home the other day. Cue drum. Ba dum bum.I was in the Charlotte airport waiting to board my plane when a man caught my eye. Not like that! He looked familiar. Had I sat across from him in some banal meeting at Company A many months ago? Hmm... I just couldn't shake this feeling. I boarded the plane and there he was sitting right next to me. Fate? Now I never strike up conversations with strange men but I was just couldn't let go of the idea of how familiar this guy looked to me so I spoke up. Turns out the guy lives in my neighborhood and we have probably seen each other around town. Nothing big. Then he threw out there that he used to work for the Department of Defense. "Me too." I replied."Oh well I worked in the Hoffman Building." He answered, as … [Read more...]

Trash the Dress Baby! Just trash it!

Tomorrow I will be participating in Trash the Dress. I cannot tell you how excited I am. What is it? Quite simply it is a photographer project where they take photos of women destroying their wedding dresses or other fancy attire. See I seem to have an extensive collection of bridesmaid dresses and military ball gowns that quite frankly need to be done away with. I could just donate them like I have in the past to such charities as The Glass Slipper Foundation or to Ugly Dress. Except none of these dresses are ugly. Not even the kiwi colored one if you can believe it. So when I was asked by a local photographer to take some time to get down and dirty, traipse through the various terrains of local graveyards, dried out riverbeds and lay down in some leafy trails I jumped at it. For … [Read more...]

Catfish, Cotton and a Chevy Malibu

Scene: The Deep South. Fall colors graced the landscape as I crossed over the Tennessee line into Mississippi this weekend driving three versions of the new Chevy Malibu.Wait! That doesn't sound right does it? I live in the DC Metro area. Why was I test driving cars in Graceland territory?Because GM decided to get a little crazy and invite some bloggers (mom bloggers if you will) into their panel of reviewers for their all-new, redesigned Chevy Malibu. Oh yes, they did Internets. I don't think they quite knew what they were getting themselves into. At least Chris, who oversees GM's blogs (they have those?), didn't. I think he enjoyed the ride and realized that we bloggers are a little on the crazy side. We drivers enjoyed his extensive knowledge of 80s music as well.So let's start from the … [Read more...]

Blog Blast! My Ultimate Beauty Blunder

Green hair,Orange Hair,Gray Hair-It is all the same. Bad.It was late at night. I was alone. My roommates were all gone. My boyfriend was out of town. It was just me and a box of Feria, the newest at home hair coloring kit on the market. The platinum blonde color oh so tempting. I just had to try it. It called to me from the shelves of CVS and I snatched it up and brought it home. Like a junkie in its paper bag I scurried into the bathroom to begin taking my already blonde and ultra highlighted locks even more blonde.Around 11 p.m. I found myself coughing and running from the bathroom, the scent of bleach was so strong. There might have been some tingling. I can’t be sure. My brain has blocked out so much of the impending trauma. When I finally rinsed out the dye and put on the … [Read more...]

Crazy Already?

Halloween is a scant few days away. The pumpkins are on the front step waiting to be carved. The candy hidden from desirous eyes and grabbing hands. T.D.'s costume has been tried on and test driven. She is ready to become Lord Vader. In our house the dog is the princess. Princess Leia to be exact. We are a month from Thanksgiving, Black Friday, and two months from Christmas. Yet somehow emails and phone calls have already begun popping up into my inbox and onto my voicemail regarding holiday menus and logistics. IT'S TOO EARLY! Isn't it? Am I being too nonchalant? I love the holidays don't get me wrong but the frenzy for Turkey day is bearing down and I'm already feeling the stress. Puff pastry? I'm in charge of puff pastry?! I HATE making puff pastry. I suck at it and it stresses me … [Read more...]

Three Stars for Spears

I admit it. I am fessing up right now. I actually legitimately like Britney's new song, Gimme More. I find it infectious. I find it hard to block out the Mtv Awards show debacle while hearing it but I still like the song. I want to run to it. I be-bop to it in my car excited when I find it on a station. I'm not proud of it but I never said I was a connoisseur of great music. I list Disco and Funk as my two top fave genres. My iPod is engraved with the words, 'Don't Fake the Funk'. While Funk might garner awards Disco never will unless it's in cheesiness and the top most played wedding songs. It really should be of no surprise then that after 'Oops I Did it Again' I became a fan of Ms. Spears. Yet, somehow I'm shocked by this.People magazine has given her new CD 'Blackout' three stars. Yes, … [Read more...]

Help Katie, Help Yourself, Help the Future

I yelled in meetings. I swore at my boss and made incoherent rants during discussions at work.I shoved someone into a cubicle wall.Me. While not exactly mild-mannered this was not my usual demeanor.I wanted to mow people down in parking lots for crossing intersections too slowly. I saw no reason why I couldn't. I am not joking. I thought it was perfectly logical to ram into someone, hit them, or even possibly maim them for life all to save me a mintue of my time.I had inexplicable never ending amounts of rage.I wanted to live in our storage space and never come out. I thought it would be a better world if no one found me. The fetal position was never so good.Again. Me. Not normal behavior for myself. While I've never been a Susie Sunshine type my dark side does recede on most days. I felt … [Read more...]

Hey New Yorker! I’m Talking to You!

And YOU suburbs of New Jersey and Connecticut! Time to firm up your plans for this weekend and realize that you only have one event you really need to be at. BASHED! That's right you heard me. BASHED!Here's all you need to know. WHO: The incredible people behind parent P-L-A-YWHAT: The ABC's of Party Planning. A one-stop shop for parents to find everything they could possibly ever need to know about planning any type of party for the under 16 set. There's good food, live music, seminars with people like Sylvia Weinstock and more. Want to throw a green party this year? I do! Learn about it here! WHEN: Sunday, October 28 from 10-6 p.m.WHERE: The Altman Bldg in Chelsea.WHY: Do I really need to say it? Because it is the first EVER event like this in the Big Apple and it's incredibly cool. … [Read more...]

Wacky Warning Labels!

Looking around my house this week I noticed that while yes I've gotten pretty good at weeding out many of the harmful chemicals and cleaners in my home there are still some that warrant some interesting and quite frankly wacky warning labels. Let's begin shall we? 1. Behold this bottle of Febreze The back of the bottle states- 'Safe to use around pets and household items.' Great! Aren't we supposed to be spraying it on or around those items? Then it says, 'Do not spray directly into face.' You mean to tell me I can't Febreze myself instead of showering. Damn! I was all set to do that today too. Seriously? Who would spray Febreze in their face? It's not eau de cologne! 2. My washing machine Notice the left hand picture. It asks that you kindly not wash items that have … [Read more...]