For Reals

I’m still sore for session 71 of Body Pump yesterday. Even the tiny bones in my ankles are crying for mercy.

I forgot to pack my underwear in my gym bag today. For reals y’all. I had to put my granny panties that I wear to the gym back on my just showered behind. Blech. I felt about eights ways of dirty afterwards.

TD said, “I’m sorry for saying, “F*cking Comedian!” the other day.” After I closed my gaping mouth with my hand I told her thank you. I’ll spare you the lecture that occurred afterwards, including my chagrin and inward cringing.

There are seven miles to be run this weekend. Yes, all at the same time. And you know what? I’m actually really excited about it. I know I’ll be exhausted afterwards but it’s so much fun getting out there even in the freezing rain that was last weekend. I’ll be kickin’ the miles to this song too. Cue 70’s cop chase, please. TD told me it hurts her ears and she would rather be listening to Barney. The kid clearly has crap for music taste.

Black mules with black mid-calf socks, zebra printed underpants and a black bra? For reals. I saw just that ensemble, and only that ensemble, in the ladies locker room today. For about a half hour. Finally the woman put some freakin’ pants on.

I think my Mirena is making me fat. I’m gaining weight, and no it is not muscle. For reals.

I think my Mirena is causing global warming. I’m blaming it for this too.