Secrets Here! Get Them While They are Hot!

Maybe it was the Superwoman underoos, but I don't think so. I wanted to be Darth Vader over Princess Leia as a kid. I was obsessed with all things Batman. I admit that I've had a crush or two on some animated figures in my past and even sported a sweet little joker circa The New Animated Series on my Volvo's Dashboard along with various stickers of the said clown. It's been pretty simple for me to admit to being a geek about blogging and other social media areas. I'll even cop to reading comic books in my teens (I bet H didn't even know that!) and I once drove to about five different fast food chains in one night to collect Jack Skellington and Batman movie gear. I'm that much of a dork. And now one more secret will be revealed. For years I've been saying, "Meh, I'm too old for that … [Read more...]

The All You Can Eat Snow Diet!

There is half a sheet cake sitting in my kitchen. It mocks me on a regular basis. It knows it is -a.) the only junk food in my house unless you count the box of Annie's Cheddar Bunnies but I think they taste like soap so who cares anyway, right?andb.) that I started weight watchers a few weeks ago and I've been failing miserably.It is not like it is the holidays or anything but two weekends of birthday parties and an endless supply of cake, birthday pancakes for TD and food for company has not made it easy. I was all working out and loosing 'the pooch' as H put it about two weeks ago and then it just went to hell in a monster-sized laundry basket.I'm back on today and I'm hoping that the stomach bug I seem to have contracted this weekend has kicked it into high gear. But seriously weight … [Read more...]

The Only Child Syndrome?

What's up party people?! I'm on like no sleep. I think I might actually be undead today. If not for reals then I could probably win an Oscar for looking the part or at least a Golden Globe. When my kids are in their twenties and all cozy in their beds I swear I'm going to start calling them between the hours of 3 and 5 a.m. and just chat away on the phone with them for a minimum of thirty minutes at a time. I'll do it at least four times a week. What? Don't tell me you haven't vowed the same thing after being woken up for the eleventy-ith time in one night.I'm hearing a weird scritch-scritching noise in my house presently and I just realized it is TD rubbing two graham crackers together. Maybe she is trying to make a s'more. Ba dum dum!I wrote this post earlier this week about … [Read more...]

WTF – Cake Edition

Holy Fucking Crikey! What a damn hot mess! Do I even need to point out the how age inappropriate this cake is? What a fucking nightmare. I want to find this misguided Holly kid and make her read books like 'The Awakening' and subscribe her to OOB and Bust magazine. I would make her read them 'Clockwork Orange' style too. Ugh. Her parents paid money for this shit? She has parents?!This cake is fucking making me swear. It's all the fuckin' cakes fault. Photo courtesy of the awesomeness that is Cake Wrecks. … [Read more...]

The Walls. They are Closing in on Me.

Who knew that birthday gift aftermath is just like Christmas gift aftermath. Our living room is a sea of ridiculously bright wrapping paper, twisty ties and various sizes of plastic and cardboard. Just seeing it this morning made me want to turn around and go back upstairs to hide under the covers. Both kids need a bath today and I'm exhausted just thinking about it. I feel old.Throw in the fact that H is going to a networking happy hour tonight and will be home late and I just want to start imbibing the happy juice myself all before 10 a.m. I think that the fact that I know I won't be getting my weekly dose of girls night this week is making me a bit loopy. I've been asked to "take some time off from that for a while". My weekly dose of girl time/adult interaction/conversations that … [Read more...]

A Tiny Dictator Turns Three

How did we go from this relatively tame hair to this insane but incredibly cute mess in just three years?!Happy third birthday TD! It's hard to believe that just three years ago you were placed in my arms for me to hold and love forever. You looked up at me with those big eyes and you felt so warm. I remember thinking, "Well, of course you look like that. I always knew you would." But the hair? No. I could have never seen that coming. You are a loud, squealing risk taker like your father and a born nurturer like your Nana. You are sensitive and mercurial like your Momma. You instigate with glee and can be quite sneaky like me too. Am I allowed to say I'm proud of that or will it just encourage you further? I love you little girl. You are quite possibly the sweetest, sunniest being I know. … [Read more...]

We Don’t Need No Stinkin’ Wire Hangers

We've got plates! Yup, that's right. When Mummy gets mad in this house plates get broken. Sorry, Crate and Barrel. I guess dishwasher-safe is no longer enough. You need to start making Mummy-safe plates now too.Behold, Exhibit A:After a day of non-stop teething induced screaming and fretfulness from Dash Two, H calling to say he would be home "a bit late" and TD going into the classic terrible three meltdown mode I just lost it. I was cutting up tiny bite-sized pieces of steak for her and the screaming was just non-stop from everyone in the house. I yelled, "Enough!" and slammed the knife and fork down on the plate and it just cracked.Can you tell I like my steak rare? Mmmm...blood.Episode 7 of Exposed Brick is NOW! Seriously, if you aren't watching this you might as well crawl back under … [Read more...]

Where’s Mummy?

Everyone knows I'm a bit of a review junkie and typically I keep it over at MPR but every once in a while I come across something that needs to be shared all over. I'm talking about Texas-based KidCore Toys. Educational. Creative and highly interactive that is KidCore Toys. They love me. I love them. Since 1996 they have consistently provided families with hours upon hours of fun and not just for the wee kiddies. Many of their toys create ways for parents to be fully involved with their children during their hours of play. From puzzles to arts and crafts and children's furniture KidCore Toys has a wide variety of items for children of all ages. They have a great blog which regularly features some pretty amazing bloggers so do me a favor and check out KidCore Toys for your next toy … [Read more...]

Stylin’

H often jokes with me that all I really need to stay organized is this sweet little number. Quite simply put, The Biggest Little Organizer ever! He says he'll even swing it so I can have one in each color and then I'll never be out of style. Lucky little me will even get the digital message reminder so I can never forget the sweet sound of H's voice telling me to pick up faves of his like scrapple, wife beaters and Schlitz (Go for the GUSTO!). A woman should feel so loved I always reply.Then, there I was standing in line at the post office today and what to my wondering eyes should appear but the Buxton Bag in real live gen-u-ine leather. Even purtier in person than on that there electronic box in my living room. I could barely drag my eyes away but when I did I noticed that the Buxton Bag … [Read more...]

Tuesday Night Sleep Smackdown

I'm awake! I slept! OK. Not all night but like a lot of the night and man it's as if I've taken speed and mainlained an entire carafe of espresso mixed with Jolt cola. I can totally thank this awesome lady for it too. She's a life saver! The only snafu came around 3:30 a.m. when H decided he was going to stake claim on the whole bed, wife be damned.3:31 a.m.-Me: Whhaatt... uuhh... OW! (H's knee has just well, knee'd me.) I try to roll over and realize that he has pushed me all the way to the edge of the bed and I just catch myself as I start to fall overboard. I practically impale my left breast on the nightstand. Ouch.H: Snuffling sounds.Me: Damn it! I cannot reclaim my spot. WTF! H has just shoved a pillow in my face and I am slowly being suffocated. I wrench it away and … [Read more...]