Stop me if you have heard this one:A woman walks into a psychiatrist's office and asks to talk about her Postpartum depression medication and dosage. She walks out with a script of an MRI, EEG and a two night sleep study (all accommodations provided, thank you very much.)You never heard that one before? Yeah, me either.Probably because my insurance messed up and listed the neurologist as a psychiatrist and by the time I figured that out I had already filled out the necessary paperwork and was sitting in his office waiting to discuss my diagnosis.At first I just swallowed it all but after a few days of thinking things over, going with my gut instinct on the whole thing and more, I am actually really aggravated. First, the whole eye roll thing he did each time I mentioned PPD just pissed me … [Read more...]
Have You Seen My Rose-Colored Glasses?
Yesterday, I wrote a rather bleak post. I was going to delete it and move on. Then I thought, what if someone else out there needs to hear this? What if someone else out there is having that kind of day? I know that in my darker moments just finding someone who is going through the same thing has bolstered me immensely. So here it is, I titled it 'In the Tunnel' and while today is warmer and brighter and I am lucky to have two such incredibly smiley children I don't believe that days like this one are gone completely. It would be nice to think that poof! you take a pill and instantly your world is better. That's what the drug companies want us to think isn't it? That after a few weeks you begin to see life through rose-colored glasses once again and suddenly that depleted glass is … [Read more...]
So Much
If I think that we don't have enough all I have to do is look to the laundry monster to confirm that we have plenty. Even though our refrigerator might look ghetto right now with it's duct tape on the shelves (those damn freakin' shelves!!) I know it's only temporary and what matters is that there is food in that fridge. When H takes both girls to the grocery store on a Sunday morning I know that I married a wonderful man. Even though I may see days as pretty dark right now at least I can still see that there is so much for me to be grateful for each day and that is all I can really ask. Enter to win my beauty box giveaway here! It's full of SPF's, make-up and more! … [Read more...]
News from the Front
Live from the front lines of parenthood: We took a lot of hits this week. Yesterday we suffered our heaviest casualties to date. The night before was long without much sleep had by any of the troops and when day broke we were already exhausted.A rundown:Wednesday night's piggyback ride to bed went horribly awry as TD slipped off H's back and he tried to pull her back up. We all heard the pop and the whole block probably heard the screams that ensued afterwards. One visit to the ER later and she is splinted and wearing a sling. The endless round of doctor visits, waiting on hold over the phone and giving her pain meds has begun. We honestly have no idea what is wrong. The x-rays are inconclusive and the kid is learning to make do using her left hand. She is a strong little soldier. An … [Read more...]
I’m the Dumb Ass
Holy canned creamed corn dogs do I hate February. Well, doesn't that just sound like a hot mess of something you don't want anything to do with? Really, I try to be optimistic about it even going so far as to read this post about finding the positives in February. It's TD's, my grandmother's and my father's birthday. It's Valentines day too. A day I used to champion with the line, "V-Day. It's better than D-Day." However, it is always this month that I begin to feel itchy in my skin. While the days are shorter they feel endlessly long and tiring. My brain ceases to function and I'm always sick. My work suffers as does my soul (isn't that dramatic?). I lose any of the motivation I had in January and all I want to do is curl up on the couch and read a good book. In a sense I just … [Read more...]
Dr. Mom
I'm in a sea of tissues today and wouldn't you know it - the million cans of chicken soup I always seem to have in my house and the giant jug of orange juice are all G.O.N.E. Gone. Dr. Mom is sick and we are out of the good stuff. Blast!The laundry monster is attacking me as I type. There's a whole legion of unmatched socks just waiting for the right moment to cry "Mutiny!" I feel better mentally but I seem to still have my moments. The moments where I just have to stand there and squeeze my eyes shut, press my fingers to my temples and try to focus, focus, focus! Moments where I find myself still starting blankly at an open cabinet or draw wondering how I got into this room and what it is I'm looking for. I feel blessed though that I have the help that I do and that things are not … [Read more...]
Possibilities
The sun is out today and I feel like things might be a bit brighter. It doesn't feel like I'm going to break my face if I smile. Yesterday, I only felt like crying maybe three times instead of thirty. One of those three times? I couldn't get my health insurance's website provider section to actually provide me with a therapist and that just seemed like a sick joke.I *might* not have a headache today unless that Irish jig music on the sweetpeace continues at such a loud volume. TD cannot seem to get enough of galloping around the house with a broom as her horse and a glittery purple bowler hat to that music. It's maddening. And ridiculously cute. And then maddening again.It seems I have joined a book club too. How in the holy hell did that happen? Do I even have room for that? Considering … [Read more...]
Side Effects
The other day I was reading the fine print of side effects on this new "happy" pill I'm supposed to be taking for all this Postpartum junk.-May cause vomiting that looks like coffee grounds. Awesome! So even if I am not drinking the java it will look like I am! Yippiee!-May cause sleeplessness. A few side effects down it says. May also cause yawning. Gee, ya think? And yes, it does. Just what the PPD lady needs. More sleeplessness. They should just add 'and increased irritability.'On a bottle of natural teething tablets I found the warning:- Consult your physician before taking if you are pregnant or breastfeeding. Um.. how many of you out there are still teething or have a secret addiction to all natural teething tablets? Yeah? That many of you. Wow. You should really form a support group … [Read more...]
Things You Might Not Know
Dude, what is with the Facebook 25 Random Things About Me disease. Hey Kids! Everyone is doing it! Except me. Who has time for that? Here's five-1. I sucked my thumb until I was ten. Yeah, that's right. It's cool. Not cool though was the four retainers, two sets of head gear and all the other orthodontia I had to have because I had bucked teeth worse than Melissa Gilbert when she was on Little House on the Prairie. I kid you not.2. I have size ten feet. I can't walk up stairs normally. I have to go sideways half the time. Especially in heels.3. I have a black thumb. Plants should not be brought into my abode. Not unless they consider themselves Dead Plant Walking.4. Once I woke up in the middle of the night and all the skin on my body shed. It was like I turned into a snake … [Read more...]
I’ll Get There at Some Point
It's a beautiful snowy day here in the 'burbs. There's no school. Dash Two is teething and TD and I have a cold. I'm trying to stay positive but there was little sleep to be had in my house by me last night. I just couldn't stay asleep and for no good reason other than my brain was whirring away on mindless junk.Today is day one on the meds my doctor prescribed. I'll take them for a month to see how it all goes. I just have one thing to say though, if one more person tells me I need to "just get more sleep and hit the gym." I'm going to cover them with brain goo because my head really will have exploded. Seriously? That's all I need to do? How about the fact that when I think of loading the kids in the car right now, the two hours it takes me to get out the door and lugging that heavy baby … [Read more...]